Strapped down to a gurney with a self inflicted wound to my abdomen 3 inches or centimeters who knows for sure, one emt looked me right in the eye and told me to write it all down before I forgot! I began that journey once or twice maybe six times since then. It's been nearly 13 years since then, yet the story has not died. I have not FORGOTTEN. IT sticks to my ribs like a traditional African American holiday meal churning in the pot of my stomach. Threatening to double me over with both nausea n fear if I continue to suppress it! It rumbles in my stomach as if I've downed a menagerie of liquor. promising to lay me flat on the floor seeking the cooling relief of the earth as I throw a lifetime upon her to receive a lifetime MORE!!! I MUST WRITE NOW!!!!